My Non-Swiss friends say the Swiss just love baby talk.
For example, they just can't drink a regular coffee and eat a normal-sized croissant like the rest of us. No, they have to have as "Käffeli" in a "Tässli" with amene "Gipfeli", "Brötli" or "Weggli" and "es bitzeli butter".
Some, of course, must have their "Müesli". Isn't that nice? The men, because they are toughies, go out in the evening to a "Beizli" for "es Bierli" or perhaps even "es Tröpfli Wyy", but naturally not more than "es Einerli" because a decilitre of wine costs five "Stützli" or more, not to mention "as Cüpfli" of champagne.
The real purpose of this "Gschichtli", however, is to tell you about a "Schätzli" I once had by the name of Ruthli. She was a real cutie barbie kind of girlie. I would go down to the "Strössli" to her "Hüsli" for a "Bsüechli" with a bouquet of "Blüemli", knock on her door and say: "Schätzli, gisch mer es Schmützli?" She would then give me a teeny-weeny, itsy-bitsy kiss and we would sit on a "Bänkli" in her "Gärtli" for as "Stündli", holding "Händli" while I hoped we would soon go to "Bettli" for you know whatli.
But all she did was drink a "Schlückli" mineral water, eat "Leckerli" and watch the "Vögeli" flying around the "Bäumli". Sometimes we would take the "Trämmli" and go to the "Zolli". Whenever I tried to get lovey-dovey, Ruthli would say: "Tschüssli, Schätzli!" and send me sadly on my "Wäägli" home. Now I'm sickly and cannot stoppy talkie like thisy. Must go to my shrinky doctorli. To form a diminutive in "Schwyzerdüütsch", just add 'li' to practically any word.
The Swiss will love you for it and give you a big "Schmützli!"
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